As of Sepetember 16th, we are no longer allowed to wear flip flops or sneakers at work. Because summer is ending, we have to start "dressing up". So today I bought two pairs of new shoes.
I have nice feet, or so I've been told. And it's easy to find dainty little heels for a dress or whatnot. But when I need normal, every day shoes, that's when I have problems. Flats are "in style" now, so it was quite easy to find what I was looking for. The only difficulty is that I have tiny, narrow feet, and it's very hard to find shoes. Flats especially tend to be wider.
In the end I bought two pairs, one with sparkly things on them and one pointy toed pair. The pointy toed ones have a little tiny heel, which seems to work best for my high arch. They both are a little tight on my toes, but they'll stretch out. The problem will come if they stretch out too much, and then I can't wear them. I've never owned a pair of pointy toed shoes (or, as some people like to call them, "pizza feet"). I don't particularily like the style, but they look good with jeans.
Aside from the fact that almost no shoe fit properly, this whole shopping trip bugged me. I don't really like the shoes that I bought. I know that they will serve me well, and that I'll be happy that I bought them - but I don't actually like the look of the shoes. I've had to change my opinions on shoes to gain a certain look for work. So that I'll be acceptable to the dress code, and fit in with the Esprit "style". And I have slight issues with that.
Maybe I'm looking into it too much. They're just shoes. Really, Lisa. They're just shoes.
On another note, I feel lonely. I haven't been talking to my British friend very often as a result of my working and the eight hour time difference. Even his emails have been short and to the point. My life is going back to only being about work and tae kwon do. I never meant to get hung up on someone on the other side of the world, and in a sense I never did...but he has impacted my life in the short time he's been in it, and I miss his "presence".
I'm considering emailing Doug. I hate harbouring resentment towards a person. If there's a problem, I like to have it resolved. I'm not done getting over him, but I hate being angry whenever I think of him. Maybe if I email him this time, he'll respond.
I hate being in the "line" of BC girls he's been with. Although he and I had an extrmely deep relationship, more so than anyone else, other people can't see that. They don't realize that when he came up the last time, he came up to see me. Without me, he wouldn't have been able to come - and only a few people fully understand what I mean when I say that. If he lived here, we'd still be together.
It's just that no one (excluding a few) understands what we had. Few of my friends are even capable of having the depth of relationship that we shared. I'm not just one the girls. Or I wasn't, anyways. It's like if Jelena and Shaunn broke up, it would seem insufficient to reduce her to just an "ex". And I hate people minimizing it, minimizing me.
I don't miss Doug, I miss what we had. I wish I could find it with someone here. And as perfect as he was for me, there is someone even more perfect out there - and I don't even know how that's possible. And when I find them, I know it'll be worth the wait.
I have nice feet, or so I've been told. And it's easy to find dainty little heels for a dress or whatnot. But when I need normal, every day shoes, that's when I have problems. Flats are "in style" now, so it was quite easy to find what I was looking for. The only difficulty is that I have tiny, narrow feet, and it's very hard to find shoes. Flats especially tend to be wider.
In the end I bought two pairs, one with sparkly things on them and one pointy toed pair. The pointy toed ones have a little tiny heel, which seems to work best for my high arch. They both are a little tight on my toes, but they'll stretch out. The problem will come if they stretch out too much, and then I can't wear them. I've never owned a pair of pointy toed shoes (or, as some people like to call them, "pizza feet"). I don't particularily like the style, but they look good with jeans.
Aside from the fact that almost no shoe fit properly, this whole shopping trip bugged me. I don't really like the shoes that I bought. I know that they will serve me well, and that I'll be happy that I bought them - but I don't actually like the look of the shoes. I've had to change my opinions on shoes to gain a certain look for work. So that I'll be acceptable to the dress code, and fit in with the Esprit "style". And I have slight issues with that.
Maybe I'm looking into it too much. They're just shoes. Really, Lisa. They're just shoes.
On another note, I feel lonely. I haven't been talking to my British friend very often as a result of my working and the eight hour time difference. Even his emails have been short and to the point. My life is going back to only being about work and tae kwon do. I never meant to get hung up on someone on the other side of the world, and in a sense I never did...but he has impacted my life in the short time he's been in it, and I miss his "presence".
I'm considering emailing Doug. I hate harbouring resentment towards a person. If there's a problem, I like to have it resolved. I'm not done getting over him, but I hate being angry whenever I think of him. Maybe if I email him this time, he'll respond.
I hate being in the "line" of BC girls he's been with. Although he and I had an extrmely deep relationship, more so than anyone else, other people can't see that. They don't realize that when he came up the last time, he came up to see me. Without me, he wouldn't have been able to come - and only a few people fully understand what I mean when I say that. If he lived here, we'd still be together.
It's just that no one (excluding a few) understands what we had. Few of my friends are even capable of having the depth of relationship that we shared. I'm not just one the girls. Or I wasn't, anyways. It's like if Jelena and Shaunn broke up, it would seem insufficient to reduce her to just an "ex". And I hate people minimizing it, minimizing me.
I don't miss Doug, I miss what we had. I wish I could find it with someone here. And as perfect as he was for me, there is someone even more perfect out there - and I don't even know how that's possible. And when I find them, I know it'll be worth the wait.
posted by Lisa at
10:47 PM
1 Comments:
no matter where you work you are expected to be a model of the (or a) style. At least you don't work for like, northern reflections or anything.
It's in the nature of the ex to be minimalised. In order for you to return to some semblance of a normal life he HAS to be 'just an ex', as do you. You don't want to be forever pining.
By
Sarah, at 8:27 AM
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