You know, I'm not nerely as ill-equipped to deal with the Doug situation as I thought I was. In fact, quite the opposite. I dealt with it very well, I think. It turned out to be the kick I needed to delete all his emails (I had all of them in a folder, from the very first one) and delete all his pictures off my computer. I even went into my recieved files and deleted anything he had ever sent me, minus one picture. And the only reason why I'm keeping that one is because it doesn't have him in it, and I like it.

I even have the desire to put the giant big bunny he gave me in my closet. I've slept with it every night since Doug left. And I don't want to anymore.

That's the thing. It doesn't hurt to do these things, I'm not even angry. I feel like I've turned around, and am beginning to walk away.

I read a profile of his that I found sort of accidently. My first thought was 'wow, we are so wrong for each other'. Maybe God's become more important to me within the last little while, I'm not sure. But I could never be with a person who is anti religion. And I know that for sure now. I wonder if I was just living on a dream, as I have a tendancy to do.

Oh, life. I can't believe I'm growing up.